“Doctor Odyssey” Review: Needs More Big Deck Energy

Doctor Odyssey, Ryan Murphy’s latest TV feature, made its ABC debut last night.

Fans of Murphy, the creator of such successes as 9-1-1 (now airing on ABC), 9-1-1: Lone Star, Glee, American Horror Story, and the recently debuted Grotesquerie, may have been hoping for a big splash, but the premiere, a mishmash of Fantasy Island, Love Boat, and [insert literally any medical broadcast show here] spent more time languishing in dubious doldrums instead.

Set onboard The Odyssey, a luxury cruise ship, the pilot episode charts Dr. Max Bankman’s first week on the job. Max (played by the capable Joshua Jackson), is a work of eager fan-fiction. We learn he has done stints with the UN, the Peace Corps, and a whole lot of volunteering in poverty-stricken countries. Max has also seen his share of pain and suffering (a flashback shows us how he was Patient Zero during the Covid pandemic. Yes, really!), and now just wants to live a life of joy.

For some reason, Max thinks he’ll find his joy (and definitely definitely not more Covid) onboard a Pacific cruise liner as ship’s doctor. Anyone who’s has ever worked on a cruise ship might ask you if you’ve lost your mind if you uttered those words in earnest, but Doctor Odyssey has its fantasy dial turned all the way up to ten, so we must all agree to roll with it.

Max, his array of neatly pressed clothes, and a hospital’s worth of advanced medical equipment are smoothly and leisurely decanted onto the pier during the show’s opening scenes. Max soon meets Captain Robert Massey (Don Johnson), a man with one eye for detail, and the other for twinkling at Max whenever the pair discuss anything of importance. Johnson has a way of making everything Massey says sound vaguely risqué, and by the end of the pilot episode I’m no longer sure if its actually his line delivery or if it’s just me.

Captain Massey is all about preserving the fantasy for his guests (Seriously, has anyone on the writing team ever been on a cruise ship? Anyone at all?). Their pleasure comes first, he tells Max, who nods sagely, and thanks the Captain for this informational nugget instead of running for the nearest railing and swimming back to shore. In fact, with Massey at one point declaring The Odyssey as nothing less than Heaven, we are tempted to believe everything unfolding before Max’s eyes is some sort of fever dream or Covid-induced hallucination. Could it be? If Ryan Murphy’s angle is to slowly reveal a starker reality behind our protagonist’s shiny world, then that might be something we could get behind. Or maybe the show is just a soapy medical drama at sea, after all. Future episodes will reveal all!

Meanwhile, Max and his team of nurses — Avery (Phillipa Soo) and Tristan (Sean Teale) get to work as the medical emergencies come pouring in. A man has eaten too many shrimps and has given himself iodine poisoning; another has a broken penis; another falls overboard; and the first poor fool comes back for a second round with a broken collar bone.

Our trio of medical pros handle everything with aplomb, but take some time to get off on the right foot. Tristan tells Max he’s in love with Avery, prompting Max to immediately put the moves on her. Max and Avery both later decide this was a bad idea but we’re guessing this love-triangle angle dangle may be dusted off for future angst purposes down the road at some point. Meanwhile, confident, reassuring, clever, humble, sexy Dr. Max underestimates Avery’s skill and knowledge, prompting some brief annoyance on her part.

However forbidden trysts and professional misunderstandings aside, Max soon finds his footing with Avery, and even Tristan, as nothing that happens ever seems to bother anyone onboard for very long. Even the man with the broken penis is smiling from ear to ear when disembarking at the end of the episode.

Captain Massey may be all about preserving the fantasy for his guests, but I can’t help shake the feeling the fantasy that’s being sold here is to the TV audience. Particularly those who have never taken a trip outside their own front door in their lives. (I’m thinking that list might include some of the show’s writers.) Although the sets look polished and sleek, they never quite look spacious or busy enough to stand in for an actual cruise liner. Furniture is sparse, and extras are few. The pool is tiny, and the background actors stand about in it, listlessly splashing each other with water whenever a camera pans by because this is what people do on luxury cruise ships. Didn’t you know?

When Tristan tells Max the crew likes to “work like a captain and party like a pirate” he means we’ll see a scene on a beach with at least one bottle of hooch, a couple of shot glasses and some suspect dancing, while Despacito by Luis Fonsi plays in the background. Presumably these are the pirates from Time Bandits, because nothing in these scenes spells hedonism in any way.

“Where did you learn to dance like that?” Avery whispers in awe to Max later on, and we all add ‘great at dancing’ to Max’s list of things he’s so so great at that weren’t really obvious until they were spelled out for us. Max then tells Avery his Covid story, finishing with how his life is all about fun and joy now.

“You’ll have plenty of distractions next week,” Avery tells Dr. Max. “It’s Singles Week!”

Seriously though, has no one ever … never mind. Just forget it.

Doctor Odyssey continues Thursdays at 9 p.m. EDT on ABC.